Fighting With Fibro Answers Your Fibromyalgia Questions……”How do You Handle the Constant Pain?”

Oh boy, I’d like to say I laughed when I got this question. And I sort of did, except for my heart breaking in a million pieces for the Reader who emailed me this question.

Because the pain is not funny, living every single second, of every single day, with no reprieve from it, ever, isn’t entertaining. It sucks the life out of you and leaves very little left within the shell of the human you once were.

So, the less articulate answer to that: I don’t. At least not well.

So here’s a few things I do:

  • I cry
  • I whine
  • I whimper
  • I beg God to let me die or kill me; whichever is easier for Him and He can accommodate more quickly
  • I swear, ALOT
  • I give up and resort to self pity
  • I throw temper tantrums
  • I get angry over how sad and pathetic my life is
  • I get jealous and resentful of people who aren’t forced to live this way
  • I cry over all my life is not and all it could have been
  • I contemplate not being able to live five more minutes in this much pain (or one more minute, depending)
  • I decide I cannot live the rest of my life this way

And then, I get a (slight) grip. Because, as I said in the introduction, there are very few moments in an hour, day, week or year that I actually feel well. And if it isn’t pain I’m contending with, then it’s any number of symptoms, from all the other ailments I’ve been Blessed with. (I’d have preferred collecting anything else, like crystals, instead of diseases, but clearly that wasn’t my path)

So. Here’s some actual suggestions of how I get through:

  • I rock, back and forth, with my head between my knees (before you laugh, try it, it works)
  • I pray and/or use Reiki
  • I watch television, because I’ve found that somehow, it disturbs some of the pathways and can distract me just enough to not want to sacrifice myself to vampire zombies
  • I try heat or ice (for migraines, I’ve just recently found that Koldtec Halos help [not a plug, just a statement])
  • I use Essential Oils. Again, which oil I use, depends on what I’m struggling with. I use Young Living’s MGrain as an initial attempt to quiet a migraine. Young Living’s Digize or DoTerra’s Ginger, for stomach issues. Roman Chamomile or Lavender (Young Living, DoTerra or Ancient Apothecary) to try to calm my nervous system. If it’s PMS or Adenomyosis/Endometriosis related, I use a special Hormones for Women blend, from Ancient Apothecary.
  • I use Frida’s Botanicals Magnesium Cream for RLS or electricity symptoms (it’s greasy, so I always change into pjs before slathering this on AND never sit on my couch without being covered)
  • I drink a 16 oz glass of water
  • I use topical Lidocaine patches
  • I summon the fuzznuts to comfort me. The more fur, drool and snuggles, the better.
  • I use healing crystals and Malas

Now before I go any further, please remember that I am NOT a Doctor. I have NO medical training. I am NOT suggesting you use any of these medications, ESPECIALLY without speaking with your Doctor……..(now let’s proceed)

  • I use drugs. Yep, I just said it and I am NOT ashamed. Depending on which symptoms, from which illness, I use a few different medications:
    • Flexeril, a muscle relaxer
    • Fioricet, a migraine abortive drug
    • Tramadol, an opioid derived pain med
    • Oxycodone, an opioid and YES, I said it. I use opioids and they work! And I am NOT ashamed of using pharmaceuticals (responsibly) to treat the very thing they were designed to do; fight pain.
    • Klonopin, an anti-anxiety, which sometimes decreases the violent stomach pains or the electricity
    • Meclizine, a motion sickness med, to stop the dizzy/vertigo spells and severe nausea

And lately, thanks to a SUPER generous gift, from one of my most favorite people, Jayne at SeeJayneRun.com, I have just recently begun using a (heavily) weighted blanket. What’s ironic about this whole thing, is that Jayne was struggling tremendously with RLS, electricity and painsomnia. After 7 horrid, sleepless nights, I suggested trying a weighted blanket to her. And, IT WORKED!! The funny thing is, she asked me why I didn’t use one myself and I told her it didn’t work for me, when I tried my Daughter’s, a couple of years ago. Jayne, in all her generosity, sent me one and IT WORKS for me too!!! The only down side is I think it weighs more than me, so it’s a little challenging for me to drag it across the room. Although it does thoroughly entertain my Son, to watch me wrestle with it.

Here’s an article I previously wrote on 8 Effective Pain Relievers for Living With Chronis Pain, which goes into slightly more detail about some of the medications I use: https://fightingwithfibro.com/2019/05/29/8-effective-pain-relievers-for-living-with-chronic-pain/

There is no easy way to “handle” living in constant pain. It fundamentally changes us, down to our very cores. No approach works consistently and what works today for one thing, may not work again for months or ever. Like everything else in our constant illness lives, it’s a matter of trial and error.

And sometimes, the only thing that truly gets us through is the persistence of our unbreakable human spirits.

To anyone struggling today or on the given day that you read this. I send you strength and love. You will get through this. Even if it feels like you cannot survive one more second.

<3 With Love, Stace <3

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Fighting with Fibro and Living With Purpose. Mom, Wife, Blogger and animal lover. Fighting with Chronic Illness on a minute by minute basis; sometimes winning.

15 thoughts on “Fighting With Fibro Answers Your Fibromyalgia Questions……”How do You Handle the Constant Pain?”

  1. Hi Stace, I can truly say ” I feel your pain” and hope God gives you strength to carry on.
    With the oddities and absurdities of fibro you have to laugh to keep from crying. If I heard anyone describing ALL the symptoms instead of living through them, I would NEVER had believed it was possible. I have been “living” with fibro and my other host of diseases, syndromes, and medical problems for over 25 years.
    I hope you can laugh with me while I describe one of the many times I’ve questioned my sanity.
    For years I’ve had massive heat sweats from the waist up and freezing from the waist down. One day while sitting on my porch, I noticed to the touch, one arm was warm and the other was cool. I even had two people to verify this. My thermostat is broken! My wonderful doctor and I just throw it off as fibro and laugh and see what happens next.
    Now, let me see if I can get this sent instead of deleted as this is not my 1st time to try to send you a reply.
    Gentle hugs, Teresa 🦋

    1. Aww, I’m sorry you struggle to get messages through! So do I, at times!! I copy and paste messages to the clipboard on my phone, just in case they don’t send. It’s the worst to type a whole big response and lose it. It can be the quirkiest thing!
      Well I’m glad this message got through!
      When I first got sick, I would never have thought that Fibro would cause ALL the issues it does. Nor would I have considered that everything else would break, as a result. Before all this, I only saw the Doctor for physicals and took no meds for anything.
      The temperature thing is ridiculous-especially if you also have Raynaud’s. It can be 70 outside and I’m wearing a sweater, only to suddenly get so hot, I need to strip to a tank top, before going back again. I’m glad they recharacterized Fibro as a Nervous System disease. It makes a lot more sense that way.
      Hang in there my friend. I’m glad you can find humor in it, sometimes that’s all that saves our sanity!!
      ❤️

      1. Hi Stace,
        I am sorry. I think I was totally self centered when I replied before. I left out the part about how wonderfully you described how life is trying to get through the pain. Everything was right on the mark.

        I’ve read a couple of your blogs and am so glad your thoughts are totally helpful. Not that I’d wish this life on anyone, but knowing I’m not alone does seem to help.

        For 25 years I’ve been struggling to live this life. I proved to myself the more I did, the more I could do. That is, until 2 years ago.. Thanks to the pandemic and my latest disease, prurigo, I’ve been out of my house 7 times since last Christmas. Therefore my mobility has been so much worse. I started to write a journal and I think I’ve only wrote 3 small notes in it since the 1st of September. My foggy brain and meds make time pass very quickly.

        Here’s you a laugh for the day….
        I have very bad tinnitus. While waiting for a doctor in yet another exam room, I noticed… turning my head 1 way made the ringing tone go up in pitch. Turning my head the other way made my other ear like flutter.
        FASCINATING! I did this so many times my neck muscles were sore the next day. Now I can tell if my neck muscles are tight when I squinch my eyes or grit my teeth.

        If Webster were around, I’d have him add a new word to his dictionary. deCRAPit….

        Gentle hugs, Teresa 🌦☔🌈🦋💜

      2. I’m sorry it took me so long to reply. I’ve been struggling to balance being down constantly with the responsibilities I have.
        Please do not apologize for anything, Teresa…..I did not take anything you said as being self centered. Although if you’re replying to a post of mine and giving me and other Readers your thoughts, it totally makes sense that you would focus on yourself!! And I would not define that as being self centered!!
        Regardless, your comments are perfectly fine.
        I’m glad you liked the post and could relate well to it. That’s why my now deceased good friend convinced me to start Blogging, was to help others not to feel so alone. What surprised me the most was how Blogging has helped ME not feel so alone. It’s a very isolating and debilitating life sometimes and unless you live it, it’s impossible to understand. So I agree, it helps me too.
        I’m sorry you’ve had even more added to this challenging life. I’m not familiar with Prurigo, but regardless, any more limitation to what we already live with seems unduly cruel. As does not leaving the house.
        It makes me crazy never getting to leave, myself.
        I’m betting we could create a whole new chapter in Webster with our descriptions!
        Isn’t that great when we realize something is connected or something we do or don’t do changes a symptom? I’d have done the same thing!
        I’m thinking of you and wishing you a good day. Hang in there, Teresa ❤️

  2. I’m proud to admit I use drugs when needed…everyday myself. I don’t see the value in living your life in pain without help. i know some brag ut I don’t find it anything to brag about. If you can go without pain meds you don’t need paain meds. Pretty simple. What gets me is how our government is lumping our pain needs in iwth the street drug problem. That’s why I’m getting more involved and vocal about advocating for our rights. Our leaders need to know what we need not what they tink we need. I read today Eleizabeth Warren has been trying to pass thru a bill that will allow pharmacies to fill only two weeks worth of meds and you have to return in two weeks for the otherto weeks. WTF!!!!! Like we need more to have to deal with. Walmart sued the government becasue they felt the DOJ & DEA were trying to interfer with the doctor patient relationship. Yeah for Walmart! We have to start fighting for what we need not just talking about it. Have a great day.

    1. I use pain meds every day, too. I resisted in the beginning, was initially terrified of addiction and then just gave up and took them. I will say that WITH pain meds, I have some semblance of a life, sometimes. Which I didn’t before them.
      All these regulations and ostracization tactics are criminal. I have absolutely nothing in common with illegal Fentanyl users. And we should not be lumped in to the same category. I’m not trying to shame addicts, it is just not the same thing and should not be characterized as such. I live in terror that they’ll take my meds, because in all honesty, I couldn’t handle all the pain I live with, without them. And that’s not how any of us should feel.
      And I won’t be sheepish about saying I use them. I had an Aunt who tried to shame me and I wouldn’t let her. I’m not weak because I use a med created for pain relief. I’m a person who is sick, disabled and in pain, who appropriately uses medication to live. It’s no different than any other med, for any other disease.
      I can’t read the news about Warren (who I detest to begin with [I live in MA]). All this business about the DEA coming to people’s houses or forced tapers give me anxiety attacks. I would like to get more involved, but I just need to be realistic about struggling with what’s already on my plate.
      So my hat is totally off to you, Melinda!! Thank you for fighting for us!!
      BTW, if you don’t already know her, find Claudia Merandi on Twitter (Don’t Punish Pain). She’s a huge advocate fighting for us and our rights to meds.

      Love as always ❤️

      1. I haave not heard of her. I follow very few people. I don’t have any idea how I have so many followers becuase I don’t follow back. I will not be shamed and have laredy spent some time this weekend sending out email. Our Govenor just had the nerve to pass a bill that alllows Socials Workers to discriminate against the disabled! He’s in a wheelchair! What the hell was he thinking. I let he know I would not vote for his relection even if I had to flip parties.

      2. Because everyone LOVES YOU ❤️
        Ugh. Its not a good policy, but I cannot follow along with the changes they make to affect our ability to get meds. It literally gives me panic attacks. I’d be dead without pain meds.

      3. I wouldn’t go that far, I don’t alwasy feel the love from within our own group. But thanks for the kind words. I plan to stay on top of and if i hear more about elezabeth Warren which I’m sure I will, I’ll let you know. I’ve only had two peole from Fibro Directory follow uup on my post about joining. I hope that’s just becasue it’s Wednesday. 🙂

  3. I have to say your first list of how you deal with the pain is spot on for me! Unfortunately, pharmaceuticals have not been very beneficial in my case, and after the last bad medication reaction this summer, it’s doubtful I will try any new meds.

    Have you noticed in the news about the ‘long termers’ with respect to Covid… the ones who have continuing debilitating severe symptoms and loss of function after the test negative and supposedly have recovered? Well, that I say, “welcome to my world of hell for the past 35 yrs!” Maybe now some serious research will go onto chronic illness.

    1. Ugh. I hear ya with the med issues. I’m currently stuck in another round of Gabapentin hell. I already tried it once and it literally breaks me, mentally (as it is this time, too). Stinker is, it helps the Neuropathy. So apparently, I’m a glutton for punishment I tried it again. Sigh.
      I just made an appointment with a new Neurologist. I kept wondering why, because every migraine drug I’ve tried, barring Fioricet, has been horrendous. So I’m not going to try anymore. Especially after my Botox nightmare.
      The meds, barring the pain meds, all cause side effects worse than the issues. It’s enough to make me crazy.
      Alas, I’m grateful pain meds work and I have a (very) few I can rely on to treat the worst of the worst.
      I also think that every time I have a bad reaction, it almost sets my body up to react badly to the next med.
      I am seeing that in the news about long term Covid sufferers and a similarity to CFS and Fibro. Maybe you’re right, Gail and somehow it will help us get answers…..doubtful, but I’ll still hope a little.
      And no kidding, LOL, join us here in the depths of chronic illness hell, right? 😉 (not that I’m wishing illness on anyone)

  4. I too take pain meds. I take Tylenol #4s and have for 10 years now. The only reaction I have if I go off is I can actually have a BM without metamucil and power pudding! And I have times I don’t have to take them, if I’m sick and laying in bed, well okay I will probably take one, sometimes when I’m out of town and not doing my usual activities. My pain is definitely related to activity. I take Flexeril occasionally. I am able to take gabapentin and I think that is why I am as active as I am. My poor sister is like you Stacey, she can’t take gabapentin either, and it works! But she gets very very depressed on it. I worry about what will happen when my doctor retires. She is only a year younger than me. I am hoping whoever takes me on (in the practice) sees what a good patient I am. I have never asked for an early refill and normally what should last 3 months, actually lasts about 4 months. Lately I am having left hip pain that seems to be getting worse. I had to stop my core strengthening exercises because of left hip pain. I think I am going to have to go back to physical therapy. I was in a car accident 2 years ago when I was in a 4 car pile-up and my back pain has gotten worse and the hip pain. Ugh. Oh well I have a warm yummy bed I get to climb in and sleep with my little rescue chihuahua! God bless us chronic pain sufferers.

    1. I’m so glad Tylenol works for you, Cheryl!! Holy cow! I can’t imagine. We of I guess I (though my poor Husband gets caught up in the craziness) decided to give Gabapentin another try. Because as you said it works. It doesn’t stop the electricity, but it brings it to a level I can endure, instead of leaving me wanting to jump. So I can take 100mg at night. Going up, even to 200mg leaves me morbidly depressed and angry, like the Hulk. God love Bri, he told me to stay on the 100 and I try to work with my Therapist to control the crabbiness outbursts. I hate medicine, seriously. Im at least extremely grateful the pain meds work and so not cause the same serious psychological effects. I cannot imagine where I would be without them. The pain really is intolerable. (sometimes even with them).
      I have those same terrifying fears that my Primary Care will leave me. She understands me and the diseases I live with and is truly invested in trying to improve my life…..I have been beyond fortunate to have her care….I can’t imagine what I’d do without it. My life would be *very* different and THAT is a horrifying thought.
      Hopefully, as more Advocates and more states fight against pain med stigmas and the seriously skewed numbers of including us with illegal Fentanyl users, it will get better. At least I pray.
      Where I used to be quiet about using pain meds, I won’t be anymore. Not when I have Readers or Bloggers wanting to die because they’ve been taken away….
      Thanks for reading and commenting. I will send well wishes to your Sister. I am truly sorry she suffers. I understand ❤️
      Much Love ❤️❤️

  5. Oh my, this blowed my mind. There was a time (when I was living abroad) in which I developed fibro symptoms. I had a huge crisis last year and mini-crisis throughout this summer. I cry, I get angry, I go down the pit too. I always feel like I’m disabled – but we have to remind ourselves that it too will pass. When I found out about the effects of electromagnetic pollution then I traced back and established a somewhat strong connection with electromagnetic exposure and fibro crisis. Some of the things that have been working for me are exercise, reducing exposure to electrosmog, taking a multivitamin when needed, sun exposure and investing in activities that bring me joy. Basically I try to compensate the lack of ‘good hormones’ caused by EM pollution, which is pain, there’s wifi everywhere now.

    1. I have read of a city, I wish I could remember where, that no Wifi is allowed within like a 5 mile radius. I believe it is due to its proximity to government testing or building facilities. But, I have read of many people with EMF and Wifi issues flocking there. I do not believe it is a rumor…..I’m sorry I can’t remember the exact details-but I’m sure you could find it.
      As for my post, I’m happy you could relate. I’m fed up. I try to be as positive and as grateful as I can be….I truly try to live with joy in the small things I get to experience or live for my kids. But truly, this is not the life I wanted or expected. And it is *most certainly* not the life my active Husband wants….so I just want to tell people that regardless of gratitude or acceptance…..I still get sad and mad and resentful…and it’s normal! We just have to get back up again when we plummet. Sometimes that’s easier said than done.

      As for the Disabled piece….it’s true. I struggle with all that I was compared to now being Disabled. It makes me cry I can’t walk my dogs alone-such a simple task. So I cry, I get mad and then I remind myself I was still capable enough to fight for my badly injured Son and that helps a little.

      I’m glad you’re finding things you enjoy and can embrace, despite the pain and health struggles. It’s no easy feat. But I agree, it helps to offset the misery.
      Be well ❤️

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